Hats Off!

Okay, I'm still a bit fixated with 1950's etiquette (per Amy Vanderbilt).

Today, it's hats, especially for women.  I'm not sure exactly when women stopped routinely wearing hats in public.  It may be about the time that the Kennedy family left the White House.  I remember women trying to emulate Jackie and her pillbox hats.  Men stopped wearing hats because John Kennedy went bareheaded so often.  And I don't remember Lady Bird Johnson wearing a lot of hats.

However, in the 1950's, women had all sorts of rules about when and where to wear hats (and gloves for that matter).

Sample question from M.M. in Oakland, CA:  "Do you feel that a woman public speaker must always wear a hat?"  Amy Vanderbilt:  "Not necessarily.  She doesn't wear one if she is in evening clothes.  In many urban communities, where hatlessness is a matter of choice, I've seen many distinguished women speakers without hats.  In very small communities, which tend to be conservative in this matter, it is probably well for the speaker to wear a hat in order to avoid criticism..."

Another woman (Mrs. J.A.F, Monroe City, MO) wrote in to say "I am confused as to when to wear a hat and gloves..."
Vanderbilt replies, "When in doubt, wear a hat -- and gloves..."  She goes on to make a list of hat rules, such as:
"1. Wear a hat and gloves to church and to any religious ceremony...
2.  Wear a hat to any formal reception...
3.  Wear a hat when making a formal call on an important person, such as a governor or a bishop.
4.  Wear a hat - or be prepared to do so - if you are a professional speaker before any group..."

There is an ongoing nostalgia for all things 1950-ish.  The thought being that it was a lovely time of peace and quiet following World War II.  While reading Vanderbilt's etiquette book, it looks to be just one more era of fairly rigid rules on what to where and how to act - lest one receive criticism for the simple act of not wearing a hat while giving a public speech.

Papillon

More fleeing from the 1950's

Another amusing bit of etiquette practiced during the 1950's - bows. (No, not something involving a shoe laces or ribbons.)  From what I can gather from the Amy Vanderbilt etiquette book - people (at least in the USA) didn't always shake hands when greeting each other.

One question asks about the differences between a man's bow and a woman's.  According to Ms. Vanderbilt, a man's bow is a modification of the deep bow he learned as a boy in dancing class.  After the bow, the woman might offer to shake hands.  Or not.  A lady's bow is a slight inclination of the head, usually accompanied by a smile.  She might then offer to shake hands. 

Please bear in mind, according to Ms. Vanderbilt - no one properly refuses to return a bow.

In a related question, a woman asked if ladies are already seated at a luncheon table are introduced to each other, do they shake hands?  Ms. Vanderbilt said, "No, they bow.  In this country there is very little shaking hands between women."

Oh, my.

Papillon

Fleeing the 1950's

As usual, I've been browsing through the book section at Goodwill looking for interesting books.  I found a couple including one from the early/mid 1950's.  It's Amy Vanderbilt's Everyday Etiquette.  I bought it chiefly for the entertainment value.

I must admit, I was grew up in the 1950's (partly).  In reading the etiquette book, I am so glad I'm no longer living there.  The book is written based on questions asked of Ms. Vanderbilt by her readers.

Here's an example of why I'm glad we're no longer living in the 1950's.

A person (identified as G.H. of La Jolla, California) asks what is suitable attire for a secretary to wear to work.  Ms. Vanderbilt's reply is as follows:
"It depends on the community in which she works.  If she works in a large city, she wears tailored, conservative clothes, low or medium, not high, heels, stockings (even in the hottest weather), minimum of jewelry and none of it clanking, conservative make-up and nails, and a simple coiffeur.  If she works under country conditions, she wears simple country clothes, which again should be on the conservative side.  In the country, for example, sweaters and skirts worn with or without jackets are acceptable, but sweaters in a city are often not permitted."

What the heck are 'country conditions'?  And the thought of having to wear nylons everyday (even in the hottest weather) makes my blood run cold.

I will admit that several years after moving to the Albuquerque area 20 years ago, I was working with a temp agency.  One of the jobs they sent me on was working in the front office of an apartment complex.  I showed up wearing a nice blazer, shirt and slacks.  They refused to let me work because 'corporate' refused to have women wearing slacks in their front office.  I was dumbfounded, after all this was the early 1990's, not the 1950's.  Needless to say, I notified the temp agency and headed for home.

I'll be passing along more 'tips' for your amusement.

Papillon