It Takes All Kinds

I like to read the etiquette column written by Miss Manners.  I may not always agree, but I find it to be an interesting read.

Sometime back, a reader wrote in saying they like to read obituaries.  (Not my cup of tea, but it takes all kinds to make the world go around.)  The reader said they had noticed the beginning of an annoying trend.  In most obits, it says something to the effect of "in lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made to the charity of your choice".  Or something similar.

However, the annoying trend spotted by the reader involved relatives of the deceased asking for cash contributions to be made to them instead.  (The relatives, not the deceased.)  The reader thought this was just another cash-grab on the par of people asking for cash instead of wedding gifts, birthday presents, etc. and thought it was tacky.

Miss Manners agreed, although in a much more refined fashion.

Since then, I've taken to occasionally scanning the obit section of the local paper.  It doesn't happen often, but I spotted an example in today's (12/10/11) paper.  Specifically for an 85-year-old named Marian W. Payden.  She's described as beloved wife of (her husband), loving stepmother of Scott and Kristin Payden.

The obit goes on to say, "In lieu of flowers, donations can be mailed to Scott and Kristin Payden, (street address), Medina, Ohio...."

In the past I've seen verbiage that asked for cash to help with funeral expenses.  I can sort of understand that.  In these tough economic times, not everyone has insurance or savings to help pay for funeral costs.  But today's example left me with a dropped jaw.  For all we know, good old Scott and Kristin are going to take the 'donations' and head for a Caribbean cruise.  Or Las Vegas.  So much for honoring their 'loving stepmother'. 

Sheesh!

Papillon